Imagine an unpleasant thought.
It drives you crazy every time it crosses your mind.
You cannot sleep, you cannot think of anything else.
The thought is always there, buried under a thin layer of your daily deeds, just waiting to be revealed and appear before you, drilling into your consciousness with a force so powerful it hurts.
You would pay a hypnotherapist to remove it from your mind, but it seems impossible.
The thought drains your energy it follows you everywhere, it stays beside you like a good Mormon spouse – for better and for worse.
All your attempts to escape it always end up in failure.
Those thin memory threads of your brain are somehow getting to it through the glare of past events and everyday worries.
It seems like anything can startle that thought – from an innocent smile of a child to a car wreck.
The thought takes over you slowly, as you become weaker and more fragile, the thought becomes an obsession.
That obsession becomes your reality…
When you cannot take it anymore and there is nobody and nothing that can help you – you take the pill to end it all.
As your tongue strokes the weird texture of the pill you realize it’s tasteless.
At first you do not feel anything…
The thought is still there and you are pretty much sure it chuckles at your silly attempt to deal with your problem.
You knew it was your own fault all along, but your curiosity had no limits.
Then suddenly you feel it for a slight second as a strange euphoric feeling takes your breath away and makes you weightless.
You feel like floating.
Darkness contains no thoughts, no emotions, and no feelings.
It’s just nothingness.
Next morning you wake up and the whole story starts again.
Sleeping pills are no shrinks.
They do not cure insanity…